1. WHAT IS IT?

Exclusive to males of the species, the noble yet misunderstood prostate gland is a mischievous lump of human tissue that can lead every male, straight or gay, down a yellow-brick road, past the pearly gates, and into a garden of earthly delights.

2. WHY DO THEY CALL IT THE ‘MALE G-SPOT’?

As with the female G-spot—which was named after the pioneering sexologist Ernst Gräfenberg—the male prostate gland can help produce orgasms so intense, farmers who live two counties over from yours will hear you screaming in pleasure.

3. WHERE IS IT?

Unlike the female G-spot, which is located inside the vagina on the upper wall near the ’neath the navel, nature placed a cruel joke on all men by locating the male G-spot about two or three inches inside the male rectum. You can stimulate it using our male prostate massagers here 

4. HOW BIG IS IT?

Online sources claim that the prostate gland is either walnut-sized or chestnut-sized—but never both. And they never specify why they always compare it to nuts rather than, say, gumdrops or jawbreakers or robin’s eggs. I will assume that the average male prostate gland is somewhere between the size of a chestnut and walnut.

5. WHAT DOES IT DO?

Ordinarily, the prostate serves as a “valve” that allows a male to either urinate or ejaculate, but never simultaneously.

6. WHAT DOES IT HAVE TO DO WITH THE MALE ORGASM?

But see, not only does the prostate act as sort of a “railroad crossing guard” between urination and ejaculation, it also aids in the production of seminal fluid. In essence, all male orgasms start with the prostate. And since it teems with nerve endings—even more nerve endings than the penis—it is crucial to male sexual pleasure. Whether directly or indirectly stimulated, your prostate gland will enhance the intensity of your orgasm by 497%, which is a figure I just pulled out of my ass.

7. WILL PROSTATE STIMULATION MAKE ME GAY?

No, but it’s very interesting that you asked.